Welcome back, Dear Reader, to my ongoing blog of hobby and competitive progress through 2026. Last time around I wrote about my trip to the 2026 Las Vegas Open Teams event from Frontline Gaming, and the five rounds I played at that event. This week I'll be talking about another event, the GW Palm Springs Open.

I have never done back-to-back weekend events before, let alone weekend events requiring travel. And I wasn't going to go to Palm Springs but then two things happened: First, a buddy on my team (David Miracle) told me he was going and offered to split a room, and second, several key people from various companies were going and it was worth my time to be there to talk with them in person. These trips have become a mix of business and pleasure for me over the last few years, and I'll typically spend time talking to the guys from Best Coast Pairings or Frontline Gaming or whatever company while I'm at them, talking about how we can partner on new stuff.

Palm Springs is actually not that far from Vegas; about a four hour drive or a short flight, depending on how you want to get there. I debated staying in Vegas past LVOTT and then flying from there but that's not super feasible given I have a child waiting back at home. So I flew back to Houston on Monday morning, had three days at home, and then packed up again to fly to Palm Springs. There is only one direct flight from IAH to Palm Springs per day on United, and it's more expensive than you'd expect (but the timing on it is reasonable). Because of this, my teammate David Miracle and I were on the same flight.

It's always interesting to go from a teams event to a singles event. I very much enjoy both, but the vibes are very different. Teams events tend to be insular affairs; you hang out with your team the entire time, including meals and between games. There are certainly opportunities for extramural fraternization but you don't really take them is my experience. This is definitely very cool when you're doing big family style meals, but also can be a bit of a shame when it comes to knowing more people outside your team. Meanwhile singles events are more fluid - you can jump between different groups on different nights, hang out with different people. On this particular trip I was also joined by Campbell McLaughlin, one of our few full time staff and the face of our YouTube Channel.

My Army

It's the same army I took to Vegas. I didn't even take it out of the case between trips. I moved a few things around to fit new stuff in the case, then closed it back up and set off to my flight.



I really enjoy this list; it's incredibly versatile and can play either a ranged game or a melee game. The big threats I want to avoid here are heavy shooting lists which can outrange me and actually threaten Mortarion. Anything that can pick him off at range is going to be a problem, since it'll have no problem taking out my drones one at a time.

On Palm Springs

view of the mountains from the hotel

First off, I can't talk about this event without talking about the venue. Palm Springs is a gorgeous place to visit, and January is the best time to go. It's warm - even hot - during the day, and cool in the evenings, to the point that you want pants and a jacket. Looking out the window of my plane as we touched down, my immediate thought was "holy shit that's a lot of golf courses" - I don't think I saw a single subdivision that didn't at least have one hole to play on. This is also more or less the start of the high season for the area; January to April is the ideal time to visit, before it gets too hot to be outside during the day.

the open air terminal

One of the cooler features of visiting Palm Springs is the airport, surprisingly - there are closed buildings for the gates but otherwise the airport itself is open air, with large vaulted canopies above its shopping promenade and palm trees to pass by before you get to the baggage claim. The net effect is an area that immediately puts you into more of a laid-back mode, and that's accentuated by the mountains in the background; the wildest part is their prominence - they seem like they shoot directly up from flat ground where the city limits end, with nary a rolling hill to be seen.

The event itself is at the convention center attached to the Renaissance Hotel, which is about a seven minute drive from the airport. You could walk it if you really wanted to, but it's not a particularly exciting walk. Despite being a golf resort town Palm Springs is still unmistakably American and Californian, littered with the kinds of stroads that aren't super kind to pedestrians; four-lane "streets" run through the middle of a town whose population is at most fifty thousand people. It's still walkable, but that's in part because the roads were mostly empty when we were out and about.

This fire pit was clutch at night

Don't mistake my meaning, though - the place itself was lovely, and I'd absolutely go back. This particular event having such a short lead time and more expensive flights meant that attendance was light for a GW event, and this meant lots of space for tables, giving players room to spread out and be comfortable. Add to that the laid back vibes radiating off the pool and you've got a recipe for what really feels like a luxury event.

I start with a business lunch (which I can't really talk about), over on the main street at Tac/Quila, a place with some pretty decent tacos (I grab the carne asada tacos, which come with beans and rice), and we end up having one of their margherita flights, which when combined with a couple of beers leaves me feeling pretty pleasant heading into the afternoon. David and I hang out by the pool and then head over to the venue to check in and pick up our swag boxes.

After dark we mosey up to downtown Palm Springs. It's about a ten minute walk, or five long blocks to get to the two main streets that more or less make up the city's downtown. You can tell that Palm Springs is a snowbird/retiree town at night, by the way - everything closes super early, especially kitchens. It was nearly impossible to find food after 9pm, and that included at our hotel. Fortunately we wouldn't discover that for another day, and David and I stumbled onto a street fair packed with vendors selling food. We'd end up settling on a vendor selling bao buns (House of Bao, I think) and dumplings, housing a couple of plates of those. They were pretty good, and absolutely hit the spot.

In what was assuredly our most "fuck, we're old" moment of the trip we walked back to the hotel, ready to hit the hay, only to discover it was only 8pm. In our defense, the flight was at 9am and we were both operating on Central time. But looking at my phone and seeing it was barely 8 definitely made me feel a little silly. The good news is that I got a rare full night's sleep before the first day of the event.

Friday

It's Go Time. David and I prep and grab breakfast at the hotel restaurant, settling on huevos rancheros (him), and a breakfast burrito (me). The convention center is right across the pool from the hotel, so we have plenty of time to go back to the room before we head in to hear Mike Brandt's "you're all losers" speech to attendees. Then it's time to get to work.

Round 1: vs. Mike Humphrey's Orks

This was about as fortuitous as matchups get. Mike is on team Githammer and most notably, joined us as a mercenary in round 6 of Challengers Cup last year, filling in for Scott Horras in the final round of that event to help us out. He was paired into Death Guard with his Orks, where he put up a valiant effort but lost. So it was poetic(?) that he'd be paired into my Death Guard today.

Poetry aside, Mike absolutely rules. What a great guy - absolute blast to play, great sport, and I enjoyed talking to him again. He had some sweet conversions in his army, my favorite of which was this battlewagon made from a Munitorum Container:



It has a bunch of little saws and blades to give it a "mouth" and was just cool to look at.



Mike being on Green Tide means that I shouldn't spend much thought on Rattlejoint Ague and instead I go with Skullsquirm Blight (-1 to hit). Orks suddenly hitting on 4+ and 5+ in combat makes them pretty bad and otherwise my strategy will be to force them back and whittle them down before engaging, trying to knock those 20-model squads down to 8 before we fight. Orks are nasty in big numbers but terrible once you pare them down a bit.

The Mission: Purge the Foe + Hammer and Anvil

Purge works great for me into Orks, though having 20-man squads does complicate things a bit. I end up winning the roll-off and drawing No Prisoners and Secure No Man's Land on the first turn. I kill one of Mike's five-man Kommando Units and grab secure, and then start the demoralizing task of pushing my Poxwalkers right into his face. The goal is to box him in and make him spend one more turn fighting his way out of his deployment zone. Orks can advance and charge with the Waaagh! but they'll have to hold it a turn if they want to engage me, stopping at his zone edge and giving me a second turn to move out and shoot him.

these guys are literally too stupid to care about the trouble they're in.

This is more or less the main purpose of Poxwalkers - two units often deploy as close as they can to the enemy deployment zone in order to stop enemy scout moves, keep enemy units off objectives, and if I go first, I can sticky most of the objectives on the table and press forward. The only times I won't be doing this is if it's actively worthless, such as when I'm up against Coterie of the Conceited. I'll use the third unit to protect my Daemon Prince via Lone Operative when I need to, and the Fleshmower sits on the backfield objective. This is because most people will drop behind you to kill Poxwalkers, but people don't like to fuck with a Fleshmower and it's fast enough to be properly reactive to threats.

Anyways, I sticky two of the objectives and push right into Mike's face. He'll get off some turn 1 charges, but they'll be right there at his DZ. He does what he can and charges them, and makes quick work of the poxy boys, but one unit survives with a couple of models after I Heroically Intervene with them. That's important for my Deathshroud, but this isn't a "drop behind you" kind of mission, it's a "clear through as many models as possible" kind of operation.



I drop the Deathshroud in on turn 2 and the melee starts. I make quick work of the units at the top of the table while I lose a couple of Deathshroud down below after Mike pops off with his invulnerable saves and feel no pains. It's a losing battle for Mike though, as Mortarion shrugs off Ghaz's unit with ease at -1 damage and then proceeds to sweep out the rest. When Makari dies to Mortarion's end-of-Movement phase mortals, that's more or less game, and by the bottom of three all Mike has left are some Tankbustas, some Grots, and a few Boyz.

Result: 93-54, Win

I buy Mike a drink and then meet up with Campbell and David to grab lunch. We're all 1-0, which feels great. The first win of an event is the best, by far - you immediately relieve a ton of pressure, and even though I know I'm not going to go winless, I still want that reassurance early. We walk up the street, fully intending to go to a diner called Sherman's Deli and Bakery, but after seeing the wait on that we settle for wraps at Koffi instead. It's not amazing, but it'll do.

Round 2: vs. Alex Arredondo's World Eaters

I haven't played against Angron before, but the general idea going into World Eaters is the same: Don't get charged, shoot them to bits before they can reach you, use the -1 damage stratagem to blunt key threats. That's less helpful against 3-damage Exalted Eightbound, and those are my primary concern here.



This has solid play into my list on paper - the 3 damage anti-vehicle exalted are nasty, and Angron can throw down with Mortarion, then get back up and do it again if he needs to. The big downside to Exalted is only having 3 wounds, so if I can tag them with Bloat-drones that's ideal. I take Rattlejoint Ague (-1 to saves), because I want the extra damage more than the -1 to hit.

The Mission: Take and Hold + Tipping Point

I once again push my Poxwalkers forward to stop his Eightbound from Scouting. He puts Angron into reserves and that means the only real threat to Mortarion and the DP is a single Forgefiend, so I can go ahead and push Morty to the middle. That's a trap, intended to lure him into a scrap where I can take -1 damage, survive, swing back, and heal. I use my Poxwalkers to block his ruin after he sets his Berzerkers an inch back from the wall, forcing him to funnel to the middle of the table and take the bait.



Alex gets a good drop on me around the south side of the table early with Exalted Eightbound, killing a Blight-Hauler and taking a chunk out of a Bloat-Drone, but I'm able to stabilize when the Fleshmower comes around and has an insanely lucky run into his Slaughterbound Exalted - I drop 8 wounds on him and he saves only one, losing the entire unit in the process.



That's a backbreaker, and by the time Angron arrives it's too late. Mortarion wipes Kharn and the Berzerkers, and Angron chases down some Deathshrouds instead. They hold on a bit with the Lord of Contagion, who stands back up and then dies when Angron explodes on death in a fun moment that scores Alex Assassination and Overwhelming Force.

Result: 92-58, Win

Alex was another great opponent and we had a fun game. I buy him a drink too and check in on Campbell and David. David's 1-1 while Campbell is 2-0, having just beaten Gladius Ultramarines with his Bastion Black Templars. We have a few minutes before the next round starts and this is where it gets real.

Round 3: vs. Tyler Bortel

This one is a R E V E N G E  G A M E for me - Tyler beat me on stream at the "Seattle Open" back in 2022 and I've been angling for revenge ever since he knocked me out of top bracket the first time I was in contention for a spot. I also played Ben Jurek at that event for the first time, and getting revenge into him too would be aces.



The good news for me is, Tyler doesn't have a lot of experience running T'au. I can get the drop on him this game pushing him hard with an army he doesn't know well. The bad news is, we're playing Layout 5 with Sweeping Engagement deployment, and that means it's very very difficult to hide, especially when his army can already scout 9" and advance and shoot on turn 1 with units which have a 14" movement. Those Piranhas are the key here and need to die immediately.

The Mission: Terraform + Sweeping Engagement

OK so normally I'd be excited to go second, but Terraform is a mission which rewards you for going first. Tyler wins the roll-off and positions his Kroot to keep me off the middle objective, then spends the first turn terraforming all three midtable objectives and smashing forward into my lines. I get a bit of luck when the Blight Hauler on my right flank pops smoke and survives that initial round of shooting, as he's able to take out the Piranha quickly on my turn. Meanwhile the Poxwalkers tie up some Kroothounds and stay alive as well just long enough to cause problems.

I push up the middle with Mortarion and the Daemon Prince and get caught out a bit when I fail a charge with my Fleshmower, leaving my home objective exposed where Tyler can drop Crisis suits on it. He does but shoots me rather than Terraforming, costing him something like 7 VP in the end. This wouldn't have flipped the game, but it would have been a better use of his action economy.



I blanked on primary on round 2 and by the time my third turn started I was down 62-19. I was certain I was going to lose this game, but I held on and kept with it. See that photo up there? Tyler moved his Kroot hounds to move block morty, forgetting that with Fly I could zigzag over them, jumping into a gap he missed and using that space to charge and kill the Riptide on the right. He also got Shadowsun, taking her out in Overwatch.



On the other side of the table, my Daemon Prince and Bloat-drone slowly took out the other Riptide and shrugged off damage from the Stormsurge and my Fleshmower picked up the Crisis Suits on my home objective. Rather than keep pushing for damage, I had Mortarion Terraform Tyler's home objective, and did the same with the three in No Man's Land when the Riptide failed its Battle-shock test. I pulled 18 VP on each of rounds 4 and 5, and ended up taking the game 92-78.

Result: 92-78, Win

There's definitely a world where I'm less lucky with that Bloat-Drone on turn 1 or with my 4+ saves against the Stormsurge - I kept using CP re-rolls to avoid damage there - and I lose the game as a result. Tyler had a commanding lead early on and solid board presence but wasn't quite able to finish some of my key units. The Stormsurge here is probably a downside; theoretically good into Morty but bad into 4+ invulnerable saves. It's a list designed to kill Victrix and I'm not really those.

I offer to buy Tyler a drink but the bar is closed. Tyler, if you're reading this, I owe you one beverage - hit me up at the next event!

We split up that evening and I grab drinks with some GW peeps by one of the fireplaces set up outside. It's a cozy hangout and I talk about the Grand Narrative and the philosophy of narrative events with Mike Brandt, Chris Stover, and Matt Rose. It's an interesting conversation that veers into discussions of interactive storytelling and installations like Meow Wolf or Sleep No More. Matt in particular mentions Chris Crawford, GDC founder and author of The Art of Computer Game Design, who would later write Chris Crawford on Interactive Storytelling, the former I've read but not the latter. It's the kind of conversation I could have had for another four hours, but we start hitting the wall around ten pm. This is also when I discover that the hotel kitchen closed at nine, so my dinner ends up being three beers and a sandwich from the hotel convenience store.

Saturday

With a 3-0 start to the event I'm in the perfect position to make the top cut. They've informed us there's no shadow round, which means only a top 16 cut will make it. With 172 attendees that means there will be some 3-1 players in the top 16 (probably five), but the goal is to go 4-0 and guarantee that happens. David and I grab hotel breakfast again (I go bacon and eggs), and then mosey over for a 9:30 start to the day's games.

Round 4: vs. Zach Point's Ultramarines

I've seen Zach's name before and I know he's a good player. This matchup is a nightmare for me - Crucible + Layout 2 is super open and Zach's army is rocking four great shooting units. It'll take a long time for me to reach those Repulsors and the Vindicators can always pop off and score a ton of damage on something.



There's a lot of problems for me there, and while I can deal with the Wardens and Victrix easy enough, the big threats are the tanks. My toughest opponents are the players who can reliably drop two drones/haulers per turn while tying me up elsewhere and not having to lose anything in response, and that's absolutely what this list can do.

The Mission: Hidden Supplies + Crucible of Battle

I'm going first, and I don't love that. Hidden Supplies feels like a mission designed to create ties, since having an extra objective makes it very easy for both players to just hold two and play footsies around them. My goal here is to avoid the Repulsors for as long as possible. I drop the Poxwalkers at midtable, sticky some objectives, and press upward to try and slow Zach down - I want key threats at midtable where I can pick them off. I take Rattlejoint Ague (-1 to saves), as that's the go-to pick against space marines and 2+ armor saves.



We end up taking a very long turn 2. Zach is a nice guy but clearly a thinker, and ends up spending a lot of time on his positioning and angles. I am not going particularly fast, either. We're on battle round 3 as the round starts winding down, and we're put on a clock. It's a very close, tense game at that point - I've held Zach to 5 primary on his turns but he blanked me on round 2 so we're tied up at 10-10 there, and while I've had bad secondary draws I managed to blank him on secondaries in round 3.



We end up running out of time, coming into round 4 with almost no time left on the clock. We work through the final turns but end up at an impasse, with a few key "well if I do X and Y fails this save" to potentially determine a point or two, but it's very hypothetical/up in the air and could go either way, plus the round is over and neither of us will just sit back and cede those points. The score is tied at 62-62 without these additional elements, which amount to points for Cleanse and Assassination for me and Tempting Target/Recover Assets for him, and the most likely outcome of that board state is that we each score another 5 points and end 67-67. So we shake hands and call it a 62-62 tie.

Result: 62-62, Tie

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't happy with that result or if I said that the benefit of a tie didn't enter into my mind - with the number of players a 3-0-1 is almost guaranteed to make top cut. There's also a good chance that 3-1 I'd have squeaked in anyways, since OGW would have put my opponents at 1-3, 2-2, 3-1, and 4-0 and given me a strong 63% OGW for tiebreakers, but that one might have come down to points scored and I had a strong case there too. Either way, I was happy to be making top cut again. And while Zach was a fun dude to play, I knew that I absolutely did not want to immediately play him again, so I was hoping to be matched into anyone else in the top 16.

With only about 20 minutes before round 5 starts I grab a quick lunch at the venue. It's an absolutely terrible "chicken and rice bowl" with some kind of orange sauce. It's not good at all, and the sauce is the culprit here, intended to give it an Asian-inspired "orange chicken" flavor but it just sucks. Campbell is set to terrorize the 2-2 bracket, while David is lamenting a loss to Blood Angels which put him in the 1-3 bracket. He was unprepared for insane scout moves followed by advances-and-charges from Jump Pack Death Company units.

Round 5: vs. Terek's Blood Angels

Terek has an absolutely gorgeous Blood Angels army running the new Detachment. He's clearly here gunning for best painted or best overall and has a good shot at both, but a better shot at the latter, in my estimation.



I haven't played into Rage-Cursed Onslaught yet but I know their deal. My goal is to keep them off turn 1 charges and kill as many of them as I can before melee happens. And when it does happen, I need to be hitting first.

The Mission: Supply Drop + Tipping Point

I strongly dislike this mission combo, and I end up going first. I drop my Poxwalkers outside of Terek's Deployment zone to stop the Scout moves that can cause problems, sticky two objectives, and press forward to stop Terek from moving into my Deployment Zone on the first turn. The big threats here I need to watch for are those big Death Company squads and the Dreadnoughts, which can do a D6+2" blood surge move into my guys. The good news is you can game the surge by putting certain models closer and using terrain to stop them from getting into melee. That's what I end up doing at the top of the table to clear out one dreadnought with my Blight hauler.



Where I get super lucky is with that lone Poxwalker - you see him up there, in Terek's deployment zone? He lived, advanced forward, and tagged both units in Terek's deployment zone on turn 2, letting me deep strike all of my Deathshroud behind him. One unit would clear his Intercessors and Deathshroud off his home objective while the other would put a huge dent into the ones hiding in the U-shaped terrain at the middle of the table.



This was a backbreaker for Terek, as it meant he had to turn around and try to dig me out of his half of the table while I scored on the other half. The advantage he had was having the close omega objective already captured, but I could counter that a bit by just putting Morty on the middle objective and using his OC 6 to dominate. The big threat at that point was the Terminators, who killed my Deathshroud but ended up being decimated by Mortarion in a charge. The other threat was the second Death Company Dreadnought, who couldn't quite kill the Daemon Prince and was wiped out in the clapback.



We'd end up going back and forth a bit but ultimately Terek wasn't able to dig out in time and didn't have the support he needed to ever challenge Mortarion, who also managed to drop a 6-damage heal after being put on 6 wounds.

Result: 65-49, Win

I'm now one game into the winner's bracket and looking at my first top 8 finish. That's pretty great, and I'm excited and nervous for the next round.

Round 6: vs. Durante Bozzini's T'au Empire

This is a nightmare round for me - Layout 6 against T'au Empire on Tipping Point deployment provides more hiding spots but is way more open than my last game.



Glyn's list is a better, more effective version of what Tyler was bringing - it's not wasting points on a Stormsurge and packs Vespid for extra up-down scoring every turn. I really do not want to go first into this list - it's a long, open walk along the sides of the table and funneling to the middle isn't a good solution, either. Glyn is more than capable of killing my Poxwalkers and doesn't have good targets for them to charge. I want him to come to me first, then have the last turn scoring advantage.

A lot of T'au units ignore hit modifiers, so I take Rattlejoint Ague (-1 to saves).

The Mission: Scorched Earth + Tipping Point

I'm going first, and that's not great. I get to sticky objectives but that's about it. Glyn pushes forward and kills my Fleshmower, then wipes out all of my exposed Poxwalkers. This rapid expansion is bad for me, since it means I'll never get behind him with the Deathshroud, but I was prepared for that from the outset. I push Morty and the Daemon Prince to mid-table, where I can control things and shrug off blows, but Glyn correctly takes out my smaller vehicles on the outside.



This one is an uphill struggle and I'm drawing OK secondaries but being kept off primary and falling behind. The big problems I'm having are that I don't have ranged support, and whenever I swing into something it's surviving on 1 wound. That's happening in part because I keep forgetting Mortarion's mortal wounds in the movement phase - I haven't remembered in a game since round 1.



This was a very close game, and ultimately decided by a tough roll at mid-table: My Daemon Prince charged an injured Riptide and left it alive on a single wound. Had I gotten that one I'd have flipped the objective and scored Extend Battle Lines. As it was, I got blocked on that one and fell behind. On top of that, Glyn has go-second advantage on primary scoring - something I could have used - and also shot my Poxwalkers to stop them from burning an objective in the lower right corner, though this wouldn't have ultimately changed the game by that point.

Result: 68-76, Loss

This was a tough one and I needed a little more luck than I had to pull out the win. Glyn played a good game and kept me on the back foot for most of it. There was probably a path to victory for me here if I played a little safer turn 1 but even in this game I needed some better luck at midtable.

I'm now officially out of the running for the top spot and while that's not what I wanted I'm not that upset over it - this is already further than I've ever gone at a major. I meet up with Campbell - who's 4-2 - and David - who's 2-4 - and we head to dinner. Campbell's allergic to wheat and soy so he's in charge of finding a place and with the round ending at 8pm we need to rush to get somewhere. We settle on Bill's Pizza in downtown Palm Springs where we get in just before the kitchen closes and grab some personal pizzas. I settle on a Margherita pizza (tomates + mozzarella buffala + basil), primarily because pepperoni after 5pm usually wrecks me with heartburn. The pizza is great, and we scarf it down and head right back to the hotel. We aren't up too late before we crash.

Sunday

Hanging out with Jake Jacobson of Frontline Gaming and the Best Coast Pairings guys

One more day! it's hotel breakfast again and I'm back on breakfast burrito before we stroll over to the venue. I'm hoping for two more wins but I've already more or less accomplished everything I set out to do.

Round 7: vs. Donovan's Grey Knights

Donovan is a super chill dude running Banishers Grey Knights and while I will never forgive him for that I did have a fun time playing him.



In a full dose of bullshit, Donovan's Detachment comes with a Stratagem that gives him [ANTI-CHAOS 4+] on a unit in the Shooting phase. That, coupled with re-rolls against characters from Castellan Crowe, means he can do some truly heinous things in the Shooting phase, even to Mortarion, who is supposed to be immune to this shit. His whole game plan will revolve around getting a unit out of a Land Raider, shooting, then scooting back into one. Land Raiders are tough for me to crack even with -1 to saves, so that can be a problem. With a Culexus for Psykers and a Callidus to make stratagems expensive, this list feels tailor made to beat mine.

The Mission: Take and Hold + Search and Destroy

I end up going second here and that helps but if I'm honest I'd rather sticky things and go first into Donovan's list, taking the moves across the table to get into better position. Donovan immediately punishes the shit out of me, getting out of his three Land Raiders and then back into them and killing every single one of my Poxwalkers. This was a bit of a shock - I expected I'd lose two squads but not all three, and while Donovan got a little lucky on his rolls, it wasn't a lot and I should have done a better job taking his shooting into account. I was certain I'd lost this game already and got a little salty. I'd shake out of it later, but I wasn't super pumped there.



The good news is I held on despite falling behind early. Mortarion dropped to the center while I put Deathshroud around the sides to press inward. The big pivotal moment here happened on round 3 - I had Mortarion positioned near Donovan's deployment zone, and he charged Morty with a Land Raider, then charged another unit and realized he'd forgotten to tank shock. So he charged a second Land Raider at Mortarion for the tank shock instead, knocking him down to 3 wounds. This unfortunately blocked him off from his own charges, as even with a 10 (Donovan had crazy good luck making charge rolls this game), he wasn't able to clear the Land Raiders to make it to Mortarion.



Things took a funny turn immediately after - I had reminded Donovan to drop his Culexus Assassin on his third turn (even if I'm salty, I try and help my opponents remember triggers), and it would end up Battle-shocking Mortarion in my Command phase, preventing him from using Leechspore Eruption. I think I technically could have done this before the battle-shock effect but didn't think much of it. Then I shot the silver Land Raider, which exploded, doing 5 mortal wounds to Mortarion and killing him. It also killed my Lord of Virulence, did 6 damage to Donovan's other Land Raider, and 6 wounds to Crowe's unit.



This was a brutal blow, but I think it helped Donovan overall by getting him free from Mortarion and letting him fight back a bit. The bigger issue was he'd castled up to try and kill Mortarion, helping me claw back some scoring. He dropped a unit on the northeast point and after some brutally bad shooting from my units killed the Blight-Hauler there and stole the point. This left me holding one point on my final turn.

Donovan pulled Secure and Storm Hostile on his last turn after pulling 15 on primary, a nice little 21-point turn. I'd been ahead on primary but struggling on secondary up to that point, trying to stay on objectives as Purifiers kept blowing me off them. I spent most of the game thinking I'd lost, then on my final turn looked at the score, realized I was up 62-60 even after Donovan's insane final turn, and we called it a game at 67-60 - no need to try scoring Engage or Behind Enemy Lines.

Result: 67-60, Win

Donovan was a great opponent and a fun guy. Just a pleasure to meet and play. I bought him a drink and grabbed lunch, this time skipping the horrible chicken and rice bowl in favor of just getting a cold cut sandwich from the venue bar. It wasn't great, but it was acceptable enough and had lettuce and tomato on it, so that was a win. I talk to David, Campbell, and Ben. I want to get paired into Ben in the final round but it's not going to happen. David mentions that he's been struggling against triple Norn Tyranids and Ben remarks that the Scintillating Legion list struggles into big meaty threats, especially if they just rush them. Put a pin in that.

Round 8: vs. Justin's Scintillating Legion

Just is here with Zach and was just an incredibly chill, fun dude. Absolute joy to play. Immaculate vibes. Great person to end an event against.



OK so remember when I mentioned us talking about Scintillating Legion? Well, that immediately came in handy. My goal here is to bum rush the middle of the table. I want to go first - it'll let me sticky objectives and keep Justin from spreading out and causing problems. I want to control the table, and that's hard to do if he's able to spread out first.

All of this has invulnerable saves, the Flamers don't roll to hit, and puppeteer models will be out of contagion range when they shoot. So I opt for Scabrous Soulrot here (-1" movement, -1 to Ld and OC). That was probably a mistake and I should have just gone -1 to hit to protect myself from Be'lakor and the Screamers. It didn't matter.

The Mission: Linchpin + Search and Destroy

Search and Destroy isn't doing Justin any favors, and I'm going first. I sticky everything, put Mortarion and the Daemon Prince in the middle of the table, then charge his flamers and screamers with my poxwalkers. They kill 6 of them, and then on Justin's turn he has to try and manage a bad situation. His reasoning is basically "Either I kill Mortarion early and this is a game, or I don't and it's over." He's not wrong, and he throws Be'lakor into Mortarion, who used Disgustingly Resilient to shrug off a lot of shooting damage. He survives the onslaught with 2 wounds, injures Be'lakor, then heals back up to 7 on my turn. Then I kill Be'lakor with shooting and that's the game. I pick up Kairos with the Daemon Prince and Deathshroud, clear out all the Screamers, and Justin says we can talk it out from there.



Justin's right - if he'd gone first or I'd played more cagey this would have been a much more interesting game, but I know that Scintillating Legion don't want to be fighting you, and it's not hard to press the issue and force them to play real Warhammer. The stat check worked, and I walked away with a 6-1-1 record.

Result: 91-53, Win

That's not my best record at a GW major - I went 7-1 with Death Guard in Tampa - but it's my best showing, because I'd be surprised to find that I'd finished in fourth place.



FUCK YEAH.

I'm really stoked with this result, and while I didn't win any hardware for it, I'm not upset about that. I'd have liked Best Overall, but I've given up on this Death Guard army being able to win anything hobby related - people just do not give you hobby scores if your army isn't brightly colored.

That said, Jake Jacobson did win Best Overall and his Death Guard were lovely - and painted better than mine. They had brighter, more neon colors but were just cleaner. My Death Guard are pretty good, but they're also far from a top painted army, good enough to win at an RTT but never at a GT+ event. Terek ended up winning Best Theme, and that was also well deserved. Campbell may have been robbed on Best Painted - I didn't see the winner, but he'll win it at one of these before too long.

After awards we decide to just hang out and grab dinner at the hotel restaurant, which actually has pretty good food. We split some charcuterie plate and pork belly burnt ends, then Campbell and I grab steaks (champion meal), while David gets fish and chips. The steak is a NY strip but still plenty tasty, and while the potatoes needed a lot of salt and pepper, I'm more than capable of covering that base on my own. We watch the end of the Bears-Rams playoff game, listening to some very loud Bears fans lose their minds after an insane throw by Caleb Williams. Campbell remarks that it's funny that they made Blood Bowl in real life. I suggest that passing has never been a part of any Blood Bowl game I have ever played - only injuries, fouls, and death.

After dinner we head outside with drinks to hang out by the fire, where we're joined by Max and Zak. Max is a Goonhammer patron who now works with the GW staff, helping run the Narrative events. He's cool as hell, and we have some great conversations hanging out. He's one of Andrew "Pendulin" Haywood's locals, so we take a photo to send back to Andrew, telling him he should have come to Palm Springs and not been such a coward. It's a little chilly out and the fire is the perfect counterbalance to that, keeping us warm as we talk about the game, how we got into it, and going to events.

from left: Zak, Max, David, Campbell, me

Every event should end with a fire pit. It's kind of an annual tradition for Goonhammer Open events these days - on Saturday night we tend to head over to my buddy Stas' place for some team dinner and drinks and hang out in his backyard around a fire pit, just chilling out. We tend to do a steak dinner on the Sunday night, but we'll likely end up combining them one of these days.

It's just such a chill way to end an event, and it was exactly what we needed. We say our goodbyes and cash out around ten pm, heading back to the room. David's flight ends up being delayed on Monday morning (he's going to Denver while I fly back to Houston), so we head to the airport together. After one more goodbye there, I hang out in the big, open air pavillion in the middle of the Sonny Bono terminal at Palm Springs International, working on articles and catching up on what I missed.



Most of this is gloating in Discord about my fourth place finish. Some of it is going through Facebook comments and deleting shitty posts from chuds. One of the reveals on Saturday showed off two female Custodes models and we posted an article about it. Now our Facebook comments are full of the worst posters on that site, talking about how this retcon goes too far and blah blah who cares. Go touch grass and actually play the game, you weirdo tourists. Deleting their comments is great because it often causes them to come back and post again about being censored or whatever, and then you get double engagement from those losers and nothing makes them madder than being ignored.

The new models are great. I'm especially hyped for Red Corsairs. It's going to completely derail my plans for Emperor's Children but well, there's always something. I still have to finish my Nightmare Hunt list as well. Lots to do. I hop my flight back to Houston and get in half an hour early - plenty of time to eat dinner with the family and prep for the weekly podcast with Norman.

What's Next?

A little bit of time off, I think. I may get in a game between now and next week but right now my plan is to hang out a bit and do hobby work. Two full weeks of GT-sized events put me well ahead of my goals for 2026, as I've now logged 13 games in the first three weeks of the year. I won't keep up that pace all year, but it does help me stay on target, and that's good. Next time I'll have some hobby progress and I may try and get in a game anyways, we'll see. A local was asking me about help testing against comp players, and I need to get in reps with Nightmare Hunt.

Have any questions or feedback? Drop us a note in the comments below or email us at contact@goonhammer.com. Want articles like this linked in your inbox every Monday morning? Sign up for our newsletter. And don’t forget that you can support us on Patreon for backer rewards like early video content, Administratum access, an ad-free experience on our website and more.

Latest

---

• Goonhammer App and Patron Updates: April, 2026
  by Robert "TheChirurgeon" Jones - Apr 06 2026
• Kill Team Tournament Report: Engage, Party, Repeat's March Madness 2026
  by Dan "Swiftblade" Richardson - Apr 06 2026
• Goonhammer Reviews: Tribal Conquest
  by Jackie Daytona - Apr 07 2026

Patreon

Support us on Patreon to get access to our Discord and exclusive App features.

Thank you for being a friend.

Already a Patron? Login with Patreon.

Fashion Accessories

Visit our incredibly official store on RedBubble.