Ghoulhammer Presents: Horror Podcasts to Die For

It's Halloween in Goonsville and with it comes all the prerequisite talk of ghosts, goblins, and vampires (at least a little more than normal). It’s a magical time of year for me where the veil between worlds grows a little thinner and the urge to be a gremlin grows just a little stronger in my heart. That said, I'm a busy father of three impressionable kids with a really long drive to work and getting my scares in can be difficult at the best of times. As someone who only recently began to embrace how much I loved being creeped out, I've struggled with finding the time for it. That is until I dove deep into the world of horror podcasts and audio-dramas.

Folks, the well of content out there in this regard is deep and the quality is varied but the good stuff? It's absolutely incredible. And after years of driving 200 miles a day for work, I've built up quite the library of faves that I want to share with you.

So, tonight, while your friends are busy rewatching classics like Hocus Pocus and Ernest Scared Stupid, trick-or-treating, or dressing up in their favorite sexy union job outfits, why not summon your scares straight through some earbuds? Horror podcasts are the ultimate Halloween (or anytime) multitask: you can fold laundry, walk the dog, or make questionable costume choices while being emotionally devastated by cosmic horrors. Have a long commute to work in the middle of the night like me? What better way to stay awake and alert than by being scared shitless by Lovecraftian nightmares? Just try not to run yourself off the road. From spine-tingling anthologies, to reimagined classics, to campy tales of cursed towns and suspiciously chatty demons, these shows will keep you screaming, occasionally laughing, and definitely side-eyeing every creak and groan in your house.

The Silt Verses by Eskew Productions

The Silt Verses

Running for three seasons and 45 (technically 46) episodes, the Silt Verses is a Horror/Fantasy audio drama that builds its narrative around the question, "What if gods were real and we figured out we could make our own simply by believing they exist?" The path the answer takes us on and the subsequent questions it opens up, meanders its way between industrial dystopia and cosmic dread in a way that simply has to be heard to fully appreciate. Expertly voiced, with a cast of characters you will surely become attached to, this tale is as much about identity and acceptance of oneself as it is about the horrors of rampant capitalism and faith and is by far my favorite podcast I have had the joy of listening to. While all of the podcasts in this article are wonderful, none of them made me sit in silence after an episode quite as much as this one has.

Malevolent by Harlan Guthrie and Rusty Quill

Malevolent

Written and performed entirely by the unbelievably talented Harlan Guthrie, Malevolent is a Lovecraftian horror podcast on the Rusty Quill network filled with enough dread and mystery to repeatedly keep me up at night. Currently in its sixth season, Malevolent follows the life of detective Arthur Lester after he awakes on the floor of his office completely blind and with a seemingly hostile entity in his head claiming that it has control of his eyes. Inspired by Call of Cthulhu campaigns, with a small dose of 'choose your own adventure' from its patreon, Malevolent is a heady story that (particularly in its first few seasons) caused me to pull over on the side of the road during my commute more than once due to particularly intense scenes. If you enjoy the Cthulhu-verse and people willing to give a generalized fuck you to Lovecraft himself, this is something you should give a listen to.

The White Vault by Fool And Scholar Productions

The White Vault

The White Vault is a long-running horror podcast also in its sixth season (currently titled Goshawk), though there are also three 'side-seasons' available to Patreon subscribers of Fool and Scholar. The opening seasons explore the stories of repair teams and scientists sent to a remote Arctic outpost to find out why it has gone silent, though it has since branched out to feature similar locations around the world in an ever-expanding mythos created by the minds of K. A. Stats and Travis Vengroff. Those early seasons of the podcast are mostly in a found-footage format which adds to the mystery of the events and gives it a 'Blair Witch Project' feel though as the story has evolved and the format has shifted I would argue the narrative is none the lesser for it. Another exceptional thing about this production is the amount of study and effort put in by the creators to ensure geographic and archaeological fidelity. Even the voice actors for each season were all cast from their subject countries to ensure a faithful representation.

Knifepoint Horror by Soren Narnia

Knifepoint Horror

If full length and inter-connected audiodramas are not your thing and you'd prefer one-and-done terror then Knifepoint Horror is the ultimate podcast for you. Written and often narrated by Soren Narnia, Knifepoint is an anthology series treated much like a string of campfire stories. Running since 2010, the show has roughly 100 episodes of creepy content you can devour at your leisure. Early episodes like 'undead' about a videographer telling the story of a gifted horror director forced to come to terms with himself during an apocalypse that mirrored his greatest films and 'sounds' about a deaf prisoner on the run were particularly haunting tales to me, though they are just about all absolute bangers and the series as a whole has inspired numerous other horror productions.

The Magnus Archives/Protocol by Jonathan Sims and Alexander J. Newell

The Magnus Archives/Protocol

No list of audio horror content would be complete without the Magnus series'. Written by Jonathan Sims and directed by Alexander J. Newell, The Magnus Archives was a 5 season affair that ran from 2016 until 2021. The series begins as a horror anthology, with archivist Jonathan Sims acting as a Dana Scully-esque sceptic forced to bear witness to the stories of individuals that come into his office with increasingly paranormal and grotesque tales that all seem to have an interconnectedness that he is a bit slow to catch on to. The show is critically lauded for a reason and features some incredibly well-orchestrated twists and turns and enough easter eggs to keep the most ravenous fans clamoring for more. While the first series ends on a pretty definitive note, any horror fan will tell you that nothing dead truly dies. Which is why it came as no surprise when its sequel/prequel series The Magnus Protocol began to air 2 years ago with the same exemplary writing and just completed its second season. There are many beautiful things about this series but one of them is definitely how it combines an anthology feel that lets you enjoy standalone episodes at your leisure with an overarching web of intrigue.

Old Gods of Appalachia by Cam Collins, Steve Shell, and Deep Nerd Media

Old Gods of Appalachia

Anyone born in and around the Appalachians knows that it's a special place. The earth, the trees, there is a weight to everything in that place that is hard to find anywhere else in North America. And the folklore runs deep. Written by Cam Collins and Steve Shell, Old Gods is an anthology series that weaves bits of local folklore, witchcraft, and history into a tapestry of tales going back to when men and women first set foot on that land. Each season of the podcast focuses on a particularly timeline and cast of characters with just enough overlap between them to keep devoted fans tickled pink. Steve Shell's narrative drawl further engrosses listeners into stories that perhaps have the 'good guys' come out on top a little more often than I'd like but there is no mistaking the quality of it all.

The Lovecraft Investigations by BBC4

The Lovecraft Investigations

Reframed as a podcast-within-a-podcast, the Lovecraft Investigations modernizes several of H.P. Lovecraft's most famous works and sets them inside a current day True Crime podcast. Currently spanning four seasons and four of Lovecraft's works (The Case of Charles Dexter Ward, The Whisperer in Darkness, The Shadow Over Innsmouth, and The Haunter in the Dark), Investigations follows podcasters Matt Heawood and Kennedy Fisher as they hunt down information on old occult and conspiracy-theory laden cold cases and accidentally stumble upon something far darker. Written by Julian Simpson and with all of the backing that the BBC can provide on the production side of things the Lovecraft Investigations are a great listen for lovers of Lovecraft and gothic horror with a twist.

THORB by Slapdash Media

The Heresies of Radulf Burntwine

Heresies is a unique Horror/Occult podcast. Set in a medieval world, the series follows the eponymous Radulf Burntwine, an aged monk-turn-medical scholar as he investigates plagues deemed supernatural by the church and as such has been deemed a heretic for trying to apply science to their causes. With only 14 episodes in the last two years and a single completed season, the show's release schedule is rather erratic, which is a shame as it's narration and concepts are particularly engrossing. The way Radulf is written to narrate his cases as he flips between scientific rigor and occasional depression over his own aged state is compelling, the voice acting is impeccable, and the diseases and madness he bears witness to will leave you rapt for attention. If you are into body horror and a twinge of science in your science fiction you should definitely give it a listen.

Re: Dracula by Seed&Spark distributed by BloodyFM

Re: Dracula

Re: Dracula is just fucking cool. It takes the classic Bram Stoker horror novel and turns it into a podcast in diary format re-knitting the original tale into its actual chronological state and then releasing the episodes on the dates of their actual diary entries. The podcast features a slew of professional voice actors and retells the story of that most famous of vampires in such a novel way that I can't help but tune in as soon as an episode drops no matter how short it is. The creators are currently working towards a sequel podcast Re:Frankenstein that I also have high hopes for.

The Last Dance by BlackAbbey Productions

The Last Dance

While not a full on horror podcast like the others I've covered here, I feel I would be remiss if I didn't point folks towards this new Dark Fantasy podcast. A fully Northern Irish production that just completed its first season, The Last Dance weaves tinges of psychological horror through its saga of scavengers, sorcery and savagery. The world-building in these first episodes is sublime, giving the listener just enough information so as not to overwhelm. Michael Ellen Sean is particularly visceral as the unlikely protagonist and episode 10 had me sitting stalk-still in my chair with a mouth full of food for minutes as I was so into it I didn't even want to chew.

There Are Too Many of Them

As I mentioned, I've been driving 200 miles a day for a while now and have devoured my fair share of podcasts to keep from going insane. While the list above are some of my favorite Horror podcasts out there, there are PLENTY of others that I've listened to that I could have mentioned. Classics like Limetown which was turned into a TV series, or The Black Tapes which I only didn't go into detail on because it may be the greatest horror podcast with the absolute worst ending of all time. There is also the NoSleep podcast which is mostly behind a paywall now but has a good 20+ seasons of well-produced content and Welcome to Nightvale which is hilarious. BloodyFM produces the SCP Archives which takes the most loved of the SCP articles and turns them into professionally recorded podcast episodes if that's your thing and have even commissioned their own works from authors like Games Workshop's own Ben Counter. There is also Archive81 which was turned into a Netflix series and The Gentleman From Hell that may be the best podcast to come out of the Maeltopia universe.

The point is, I could go on and on, but this Halloween night (or if you're like me, just about any night) why not pop open your podcast app of choice and settle in for some scares while the teens next door steal the pumpkins from your front yard and run off thinking you didn't notice or that you actually cared.

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Tags: Podcasts | Ghoulhammer